Yesterday, we took our old roommate to the Sports Arena swap meet and I turned into major bummer fest. Like pouting and wandering aimlessly. It was sprinkling and cold, so I ate a funnel cake (I know, right!) and wore dark sunglasses and didn't buy anything (at first.) I even found myself making faces at the sellers when they told me the prices of things, because it just sounded so greedy to me. (You know me, I like getting things for super cheap and selling them for super cheap. Everyone wins!) During this tantrum, I had a lot of time to think, and thankfully figured out why the hell I am such a sourpuss lately.
Going treasure hunting is, hands down, one of my favorite things to do in the world, and I have to say, that recently, I have started to enjoy it less. I didn't know why. I thought maybe just because I was worried about getting caught up on our bills, or maybe that we haven't been getting the deals and finds we usually get. I have become so worried about our shop and keeping it full, and finding new "inventory" that I lost the undying love that I had for it to begin with. Considering my second favorite thing in the world is sharing the great items I find with the world, our shop has been such a joy to have. Except when it needed to start being more than a hobby, and be something to rely on.
I think that the recent stress that I have had about keeping our shop afloat in the sea of the vintage and hand crafted virtual marketplace has put a damper on the reason why we started our shop to begin with. We started this shop because we knew that we had the *gift* for finding really incredible treasures and wanted to share them with the world. I love digging up something rare and forgotten, and being able to share it. I have gotten so many emails saying things like "I got this for my Mom, and it brought tears to her eyes because of all the memories." or "I had this when I was a kid and wanted to get one for my child. I never would have been able to do that without your shop."
I realized that through all my worry and complaints about working a full time day job, I am not ready to give up the security of whether or not I am going to be able to pay bills and buy groceries and save up for the future. Thankfully, for now, I will be working full time, with a substantial pay increase, doing something that I have loved for a long time, and I can go back to loving our shop and having fun with it. I mean shoot, who wouldn't want to make cake all day and then come home and package up treasures and ship them out to new friends, go to the flea market on the weekends. This has been the best revelation I have ever had.
Please, friends, if you plan on or have your own shop of handcrafted or vintage, and you lose the sparkle that made you start your shop top begin with, don't worry, you are not alone! It has been a roller coaster ride or good and bad and scary, and stressful, and fun. Just keep to heart what makes you happy and don't give up! Has anyone else felt this? How did you deal with it?
We're heading to National City flea market right now, and I plan on having the time of my life.